The Process of Decision Making

decision making couple

Have you ever agonized over whether or not to change jobs? How did you process it as a couple?

I (Heidi) work part-time for a small company. Recently I agonized over whether or not to change jobs. An opportunity presented itself and it met many of my qualifications (schedule, pay, commute, etc.). One minute I would be 95% certain to stay in my current job and hours later I would be 95% sure the best thing was to change jobs.

To say this was difficult is an understatement. Brad and I spent hours praying about both opportunities and sought godly counsel from people we trusted. But the godly counsel we sought was conflicting – some people said to stay; others said go. We made pro and con lists. We did everything we knew to do when faced with a tough decision. 

Finally, time was running out and we had to choose. Brad and I decided I would take the new opportunity and we went to sleep for the night. Everything was settled, right? Wrong.

The next morning we woke up and determined God had guided both of us to the same conclusion – I was to stay in my present job. As I pondered our process and wondered why we had come down to the 11th hour to make a final decision, it occurred to me that the Lord wanted me (and us) to not only make a decision, but also go through the process of decision-making. “Why?” I wondered.

Here are the answers I discovered:

1. It develops resolve

Sometimes we need to go through a decision-making process to develop a strong resolve. We had analyzed all aspects of both jobs and in the end, we determined I was to stay in my current role. Now I can go to work with the assurance that this is where I am to be and I won’t look back. That door has closed. I need to practice contentment in my current job. I liken it to the political term, a “vote of confidence.”

2. It develops gratitude

I am more grateful and appreciative for my current job. I enjoy the work I do and the people I work with. That’s a blessing and I shouldn’t take it for granted. God has given me favor at my place of employment and I need to trust Him with my future.

3. It develops empathy

Brad and I have greater understanding for people as they make similar career choices and decisions. There are many factors to consider in making a job change and each opportunity is different. It can be agonizing. I’ll be more sensitive to others as they consider career moves.

4. It develops learning

I needed to go through the process because the Lord had things He wanted to teach me. In talking to our godly counselor about the two jobs, he said every marriage needs “air” – space to breathe. One opportunity provided more air than the other. I chose the job with some space.

5. It develops faith

One job is more secure and comfortable. The other job requires more faith because its future is less certain. In my flesh, I want security, comfort, and control. But God wants me to walk by faith. I realized I was considering the other job partly out of fear of what could happen and fear is never a good reason to make a decision. Most of us acknowledge we want to live by faith, but when faced with the opportunity to do so, do we really choose the unknown of faith over the security of the comfortable?

God has always been faithful to us and He will continue to be. Therefore, we decided I’d stay in my current company and take the bigger step of faith.

How about you? Have you ever taken a faith journey with a job and where did it lead you? We’d love to hear your story of how you have processed decision making as you build your marriage.

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