In our work with couples we see a fairly equal number of men and women who yield to temptation and throw their marriage and all that they once held dear in jeopardy. We are no strangers to the perils of yielding to temptation or its consequences. That’s why we work so diligently to urge you not to take your marriage for granted, but to proactively BUILD your marriage!
One of the key motivators that makes temptation of any kind so appealing is a sense of entitlement. Satan used this tactic in the Garden of Eden with Eve when he appealed to her “right” to eat the fruit that God denied. “God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” (Genesis 3:5) He implied that she was entitled to know good and evil and God was holding out on her.
Satan used the same appeal with Jesus. “IF you are the Son of God, tell this stone to become bread.” (Luke 4:3) In other words, Jesus was entitled to have bread and enjoy it after forty days of not eating anything.
The devil isn’t creative in his approach. He does the same with us today.
- “Your spouse has been holding out on you. You’re entitled to some porn—you need the sexual release. At least you aren’t with someone else.”
- “Your spouse hasn’t been loving or kind, have they? They’re always angry. You deserve to be in a casual relationship where you can be affirmed and hugged.”
- “Your loneliness is going to suffocate you. Having a close friend of the opposite sex will help you endure your marriage.”
- “Your spouse doesn’t even know you or understand you. You need someone who is really a soul-mate.”
Men and women, these are all lies from the enemy. He wants to divert you from God’s plan by holding out an appealing deception. His desire is to destroy your marriage and neutralize your effectiveness for Christ—as well as your legacy you are building for your children.
Think of it this way: if Satan is working to draw you away from your spouse, then you need to fight all the harder to draw NEAR to your spouse and to Jesus.
If you have been yielding to temptation, don’t rationalize or try to figure out a “good timing” to stop—there isn’t one. Stop now. End the porn/relationship/flirting immediately and leave the other person in God’s hands. You belong to Jesus and your spouse only.
When the temptation comes roaring back into your mind, maybe all you can do is say the name of Jesus out loud over and over until there is release and victory. God’s promise is true: “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”
As you do, you will experience God’s peace and blessing in your life and you will be taking proactive steps to build your marriage!